If Gossip Girl Characters Were Fashion Brands
By Alexus Mosley
On the Upper East Side, fashion is never just a wardrobe choice. It’s a language, a lineage, and a lifestyle. Every look tells a story, every accessory has a motive, and every outfit is a strategic move in the social chess game. So naturally, if the Gossip Girl characters were fashion brands, they’d each embody a label as iconic and distinct as their personalities.
Consider this your front-row seat to the UES fashion multiverse.
Serena van der Woodsen as Chloé
Golden, glowing, and effortlessly ethereal.
Serena is the girl who throws on a chiffon dress and somehow looks like she walked out of a campaign. Chloé is soft, romantic, bohemian-rich, and slightly undone, exactly like Serena’s whole vibe.
”Chloé' girl energy” is barefoot at a Hamptons bonfire, with heirloom jewelry, and never trying too hard because she doesn’t have to.
Blair Waldorf As Dior
Structured romance, drama, precision, and a bow placed just so.
Blair is poetic, disciplined, and filled with old-world elegance. Dior provides the theatrical femininity, adding the polished red-carpet grace for the girl who believes that destiny is stitched, not stumbled into.
Chuck Bass As Tom Ford
Midnight decadence and tailoring that whispers danger.
Tom Ford is Chuck Bass distilled. Very rich, intoxicating, and perfect for nightlife glamour. He’s the king of Manhattan after dark, and Tom Ford builds his wardrobe for exactly that.
Lily van der Woodsen As Oscar de la Renta
Lily is all pearls, polish, poise, and Upper East Side perfection. So, of course, she would be none other than Oscar de la Renta. Her natural aesthetic is timeless, elegant, sophisticated, and socially impeccable, just like the classic American luxury brand.
Nate Archibald As Ralph Lauren Purple Label
As the poster child for Golden-boy Americana and the Hamptons heartthrob, Nate is the living embodiment of clean, classic, old-money ease. As the lacrosse-playing, golden retriever archetype of the UES, Purple Label’s understated luxury fits him like a glove.
He doesn’t need logos. He is the logo.
Jenny Humphrey As Vivienne Westwood
Little J has that whole glamorous Punk Princess vibe perfected.
Her raw ambition and edge fit Vivienne Westwood’s rebellious couture DNA perfectly. Restitching all the rules, she gave us structured chaos with theatrical silhouettes, corsets, and tartan. If anyone on the UES could lead the punk revolution, it was Little J.
Dan Humphrey As Acne Studios
He’s minimalist, intellectual, slightly pretentious, but undeniably cool.
Acne Studios is the Brooklyn creative brand with neutral palettes, effortless denim, and “I’m smarter than I look” energy. Dan lives in his head and his manuscripts, and Acne fits that quiet fashion identity.
Perfect brand for the boy who critiques society while secretly wanting to be part of it.
Georgina Sparks As Mugler
Mugler is sharp, shocking, and unapologetic, and so is G.
Georgina is the femme fatale of the UES, and Mugler is the only house with enough bite to match her. The structured shoulders, dark glamour, and silhouettes were meant to cause emotional damage.
Vanessa Abrams as AllSaints
Every LES film student needs AllSaints in their starter pack. Leather jackets, neutral layers, practical boots, and a vibe that whispers “don’t look at me” while wearing statement jewelry.
As the girl who is most likely editing her documentaries at 7pm in a coffee shop, Vanessa embodies anti-UES chic.